Finding myself....

I am lost... Stuck.... Pretty pathetic i think... This whole month i have been trying to run away from all the problems i m facing.... Juz sitting at home everyday reading... It keeps me calm and have a clear mind to think... But of course running and avoiding is not the best solution... Surprisingly this whole month of running and avoiding, i have people coming up to me to tell me their problems... Haha kinda funny huh??? Me running away from my own problems but i let myself get tangle up on others.

I love books. There is one book that most of the people on earth should know. Unless you have been living under a cave or something. In the book, DaVinci Code, i agree with a sentence that say something like this "people choose to believe, see and hear what they want". This sentence have many other meanings in it. It shows that in every sense, there is no right or wrong. There is just choices which we will be making.

I live my life believing that two people from two different world can always be together. I did not take up this believes from any books or movies i have seen. Its just me. Original thinking. Many people disagree with me. But i somehow still stick to my believes.

I just read one of my friend's blog. I dont know how 2 respond. Maybe i am just too numb to feel anything and how to respond. I wish i could find someone that would care, understand and love me too. But for me i hope that one day i would finally know that i am in love... In all the time in my high school life, i have been jumping into relationships and jumping to conclusions that i love them. But truly i dont have a clue. I might afraid to lose them, i might cry days for them, my heart might jump fast when they talk to me. But when i look back now, i cant say i m in love even for once. If any of my exes reads this, i m sorry. I have been dishonest to you guys and myself all this time and i guess i am just too tired to hide anymore.